So, its Mothers Day again and we come out in our numbers to honour our mothers but for me I always used to dread days like this because the ache and pain of not having my biological mum here with me was real. For the first the years after she passed on, I never really progressed through the five stages of grief as I should as I was stuck in the denial stage for a while thinking it was all a bad joke and hoping she would reappear and tell me it was so but alas it wasn’t to be..
I get jealous when my friends complain about their mums always being on their matter, either for marriage or even a career choice and I secretly wish I had what they so easily take for granted and yes in my hunger to be loved and wanted by someone else’s mum(s), I have been burnt quite a few times and so I have learnt to stay strong and alone but not until it dawned on me that I had a surrogate one albeit in my elder and only biological sister who has tried her bit to fill in the gap of not having my mum here. I love her tenacity and courage which are traits she obviously got from my late mum but there will always be that yawning gap in my heart for you, Ma.
I miss you everyday you are not here even though I know you are in a better place now. Its been over 2 decades without you but I am grateful for the lessons in integrity, hardwork, perseverance you have taught me posthumously and I will forever hold you close to my heart.
I love you Florence Nkechinyere Ucheibe a.k.a Senior Lecturer, Mumsie Scabzeey
(Never got the story of the name though.)